Today.

Today Khage and I bonded over Graham cracker milk dunking. We had a one way conversation where I  tried to persuade him to sample a little bite because we have never ventured into the land of dunking foods into our milk before. I was shocked to see him actually taking bites one after another and not shoving the food away, when it comes to trying new things he is such a food snob. Reason number 107 that he is just like his father and reason number 105 why, aside from the blood that runs through his veins and his dark eyes, he is nothing like me.

As I watched him nibbling on his soggy cracker I couldn't help but feel overwhelmed with so many emotions about his first birthday coming up. I have been doing a pretty good job holding myself together over this upcoming milestone. I have on numerous occasions almost lost myself to a crying blubbering mess but I have managed to subdue it for a little while longer. I see a complete meltdown happening before his first birthday even comes about. I apologize beforehand to Brad for having to come in and clean that mess up.

This kid is my whole heart, ^{well he half'sies it with his Daddy}, and I am finding it harder and harder to give away my needy baby to an independent toddler. I will cling to him the rest of this week embracing the tiniest bit of baby that he has left to offer me. And I couldn't hold back the flood of love that was sweeping in during this snack time, I had to get in there and smooch that soggy cracker face. And that he did shove away. See that? He is already too big to let Mommy plant one square on his face.