On some mornings my two overly rambunctious little ones are no match for my mommy skills; I can juggle both of their needs all the while keeping volume in my hair and a permasmile plastered on my face. I can prepare a bottle for Harlyn, whip Khage up some pancakes and maintain a complete state of patience while both kids yank on my pant legs and scream for attention.
And then there was today.
Khage was in dire need of my time at the exact moment that I discovered a fresh deposit in Harly's diaper. So I changed her while attempting to distract Khage from realizing that I was tending to her more urgent need first. Somewhere between wake up time and breakfast these two got the best of me.... that patient and unruffled mommy could not be summoned from inside of me.
It took me all of 20 minutes before I realized that during that diaper change I forgot to place a fresh diaper where the dirty diaper once belonged, I just snapped on her onsie and tended to Khage.
Thank you pee spot for making me aware of my massive mommy fail for the day.
Disclaimer: that spot is most definitely not urine. I couldn't possibly stumble upon a pee spot on the carpet and snap pictures of it right in front of the guilty party, and her brother, for fear that they would both assume this form of activity was favorable.
Could you imagine days from now when Khage has an inkling to pee in a corner somewhere in the house, Of course we are allowed to pee on the carpet Harlyn. Remember last time you did? Mom was so proud she ran to grab her camera to take photos of it like it was the first time I successfully went poop on the potty.
(I can't be the only person who took a picture of their kid's first turd on the potty... right?)
So instead I huffed and puffed about it, cursed that perfect mommy for not making an appearance today and cleaned it up... then I did what any normal mommy blogger would do: I poured water on the carpet to stage the original accident once both kids were down for a nap.
Wednesday, March 26, 2014
Monday, March 24, 2014
Let Her Freak Flag Fly
There are some babies who just eat, sleep and poop.
Then there is Harlyn.
When she was just a few months old we could already see glimpses of her personality, but now that she's older it refuses to be contained. This ones a hot mess.
For starters the girl lacks all manners completely. She shovels food into her mouth like an animal, and those feet comfortably placed on the table during dinner... really child were you raised in a barn?
Remember those scary baby faces (mentioned here) well they are only getting worse... or better depending upon if you dig this kinda look.
And if you are in the market for a smile... this is really the best its gonna get. No sweet little girl smiles coming from this one. Between the nose scrunch and evil eye its going downhill pretty quick.
Then she climbs into things all of the time. Great if she would just stay in them for longer then a few seconds so I could take a break from chasing her around.
And we can slap a bow and some ruffles on her all we want but its not going to change the fact that already she reeks of a tomboy. If given the opportunity she will hightail it to the garage to seek out tools and other potentially dangerous things. After all she is her father's daughter.
And she is constantly hanging her fat little diapered butt up in the air. Which seems cute enough, until you realize that the girl's pluming is pretty overactive and this may be her way of letting you know that a changing is in order.
I love her and all her strangeness... but a little class wouldn't hurt.
Friday, March 21, 2014
The Price He Pays for Fun
Safe to say this new addition to Khage's face happened on Daddy's shift.
Its not like these things don't happen on my watch.
Its just that these things don't happen on my watch.
Its really not Daddy's fault, the guy just isn't a Mommy and we can't blame him for that.
Trust me I have tried... its a worthless battle.
I am surely not saying that things have NEVER in history happened when I was supervising, because they have. But those accidents were all pretty minor and I blame the eyes on the back of my head.
Not the front ones.
The front ones rarely let me down.
But those rear eyes... those things aren't apart of the original design. They are still working through some kinks. I'm thinking by the third kid they'll be solid.
What it really comes down to is fun. Daddy is a dirty little fun haver and Khage is along for the ride... until he's not anymore because he flew out of the bike trolly.
No seriously Khage flew out of a bike trolly.
Brad says faulty brittled straps but I say it was the fun that flows through Brads veins... darn that fun. Darn it right to heck. I guess I am just too safe... safe and superficial. That face has to be in family portraits and I like it better when its not ridden with road rash.
Good thing this kids a quick healer.
Trust me I have tried... its a worthless battle.
I am surely not saying that things have NEVER in history happened when I was supervising, because they have. But those accidents were all pretty minor and I blame the eyes on the back of my head.
Not the front ones.
The front ones rarely let me down.
But those rear eyes... those things aren't apart of the original design. They are still working through some kinks. I'm thinking by the third kid they'll be solid.
What it really comes down to is fun. Daddy is a dirty little fun haver and Khage is along for the ride... until he's not anymore because he flew out of the bike trolly.
No seriously Khage flew out of a bike trolly.
Brad says faulty brittled straps but I say it was the fun that flows through Brads veins... darn that fun. Darn it right to heck. I guess I am just too safe... safe and superficial. That face has to be in family portraits and I like it better when its not ridden with road rash.
Good thing this kids a quick healer.
Monday, March 17, 2014
Farmer in the dell.
But 'round these here parts we like to say farmer in the side yard... we don't have us a dell.
In fact I am not even sure what a dell is.
Googled it...Because this blog is fun AND educational. A dell is a small valley among a lot of trees.
I told you we didn't have a dell.
But we do have farmers.
And this farmer is mighty proud of his harvest.
In fact I am not even sure what a dell is.
Googled it...Because this blog is fun AND educational. A dell is a small valley among a lot of trees.
I told you we didn't have a dell.
But we do have farmers.
And this farmer is mighty proud of his harvest.
Then this one just sits on the job and reaps the nutritious benefits.
In addition to the scrawny carrots, we also have regular sized ones, bushels of romaine, red lettuce, cauliflower, eight tomatoes (yup, only 8), and heaps of spinach.
For our first go at farming I am pretty impressed with ourselves. I would have been happy just to see the plants grow in size... its really just an added bonus that some of it was edible.
Now excuse us while we go plow the fields.
Well, we are not going to do it right this second but that phrase makes for a pretty decent closer on this post. And did I mention we don't even have a plow... we just kinda turn up the dirt with a shovel and a pickaxe.
So, in summarization: no dell and no plow. Obviously we are running a pretty scanty operation over here... such is the life of a few farmers in the suburbs.
Nine Months
She has become quite the little scaredy cat
She has six teeth now
I cannot emphasis enough how frustrating it is to change her diaper & dress her because she CANNOT sit still
She can successfully climb off furniture and down the stairs
She talks baby babble all day long
She loves playing in the shoe basket and tampering with her nightlight
She will lay down on the floor as if she is exhausted then pop up within seconds fully energized
Hey hair blows every so sweetly in the wind because its so wispy
She has taken a few steps on her own
She says Dada but rambles it off all day long and to no one in particular
She has got a mean case of the crazy legs
Squirrely is the best adjective used to describe her
And
Between that adorable face and the quirky personality she is absolutely the best girl in the world.
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